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Posted January 14, 2004 at 08:43:05 AM by Bean

First of all, I think it's stupid that vacuum has two u's and no e's in it.  Did we get this word from Russia or something?  As it turns out, no: (Latin, empty space, from neuter of vacuus, empty, from vac re, to be empty.)

Anyway, as a favor to my buddy Scuba Steve, I decided to let a Rainbow salesman come to my house and demo an E-Series Rainbow Cleaning System (vacuum cleaner).  As it turns out, Scuba Steve gets all kinds of freebies from Rainbow for giving out name and nubers as referrals, or "green lights" as the salesman called them. 

Let me back up to the true origins of this story.  About a week ago, Steve emiled the duck:

have to move a desk for my mom after work, then have to watch a vaccuum salesman waste my time for about an hour, to get free attachments for a guy i work with who bought one of these things

We discussed vacuum cleaners cleaners for a while, and chuckeled at how anyone could spend $1700 on a vacuum.  A good hearty laugh was had by all.  The next day, Steve shot out another email:

bought a rainbow sweeper last night, wasn't planning on it, but they sold us on it. by us, i mean her. doesn't bother me to buy it though, since we won't have to buy another sweeper for 30 years. plus the shit that comes out of our old sweeper, which is only 3 months old, was disgusting. anyway, anyone interested in doing a demo, to help me get free stuff? you're not expected to buy anything, and you get a free 3 day, 2 night mini vacation, which i think is real, unlike the one dooley won. if i get 8 demos signed up, we get a free upholstery attachment, and a shampooer.

Hole, e, shit, he bought one.  We were floored, and another good hearty laugh was had by all.  M1, in particular had a pretty funny response:

i own something that costs 15% more, and also does not have a filter to dick with. while it does not pick crud off my floor, it also uses no electricity.
it's called my car.
as an added bonus, i can move great distances by simply pressing on the controls.

Now, fast forward to last night.  Mike, the Rainbow salesman from Bloomington, showed up at my door at 7:30.  He brought in a few boxes and started unpacking.  He was disapointed that Stefanie wasn't there yet - "It's a little more difficult when both parties don't see the demo, she won't understand why you want to buy one", he said.  "I have no intention of buying a $1700 vacuum cleaner", I thought.

He did his thing, vacuumed up some junk from the carpet after I had gone over it with our old vacuum, showed me how the air/water filter doo-dad worked, and showed me the awesome, raw cleaning power that you get when you combine suction, airflow, AND water.  And I was sold, I bought one then and there.

Really?  No, not really.  About 1/2 way through his demo, Stef showed up.  He insisted on starting over so she could see everything.  I refused his request.  So he continued, vacuuming, showing me attachments, fluffing pillows, scenting the air, etc. for about 45 more minutes.  Finally, the moment of truth arrived.

Mike: So do you like the rainbow?
Me: Yes.
Mike: Do you think it is a good cleaning system?
Me: Yes.
Mike: If you had one, would you use it?
Me: Yes.

Mike: Do you like me?
Me (confused): Uh... yes?
Mike: Do you want to help me out?
Me: I guess so.
Mike: Would you like to buy a rainbow from me, tonight, at the special price of $1700?
Me: No.
Mike: Why not?
Me: Because $1700 is an order of magnitude more that I would pay for a vacuum.
Mike: What do you think a fair price would be?
Me: Well... (wanted to say $150)
Stef: I think the price is fine, we just cant afford to spend that kind of money right now, but we appreciate your time, and thanks for the demo.

Boo-yah, Stef swooped in to save the day.  I think Mike took the hint.  He spent the next 20 minutes or so packing up his equipment and making small talk, all the while trying to get more names and numbers out of me.  I told him I wouldn't feel comfortable giveing out names before asking permission, but that I would call in some contacts for him if I knew of any.

All in all, the demo took 2 hours.  It was slightly entertaining.  I conclude that the Rainbow is a good cleaning device, but about $1550 too expensive for my blood.

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